Rumour Has It...

this was my entry for a short story competition a couple of weeks ago. if you ask me i'd say it was just an experiment gone awry. so i'll let you judge, i'll give you a warning though, its not much of a story. so please be honest with your comments coz i really cant figure out why this story won the second place, i was just having some fun. the topic was 'rumour has it'. now what sort of a story can you come up with other than a high school story of gossip????


“Rumour has it that all dogs are cats, and all cats are dogs”, said Nosy Parker. Nosy and I had just settled down on the couch for a cup of tea, a routine event in our ‘mundane’ lives. Nosy’s statement might seem a little odd to the rest of the world, but if you live in Quipsville, it doesn’t seem odd at all.
Nosy works at the local rumour mill. The job’s a bore, so the lads at the mill try to liven things up by exchanging tit-bits about the town. Truth be told, the lads at the mill are the only reliable source of information as far as this town is concerned. So if Nosy says all dogs are cats and all cats dogs, there must be some truth in it. I find those little chats with Nosy a nice way to unwind at the end of the day. I work at Barney’s vineyard, and maintaining that grapevine isn’t a piece of cake.
Getting back to cats and dogs, Nosy said that he’d gone to attend the First Annual Canine-Feline Convention a couple of days ago. Apparently the growing disregard for pets by humans has forced dogs and cats to join hands and make a united stand. Both parties agreed that it was high time they stopped bickering amongst themselves. In the words of Nosy, “There will soon be a day when the cat barks and the dog mews, and together they’ll raise a cacophony that will burst the eardrums of every evil human.”
That’s Quipsville for you. This isn’t an ordinary town for sure. There’s a certain quaint charm that’s unique to it. I happened to first pass through this town eight years ago. I was on a trip across the country. I didn’t intend on staying here long, but Quipsville grows on you. I never left.
As Nosy goes on with his stories, I stare out of the window. Little Joey is still patiently waiting for the molehill to turn into a mountain.
Like I said, in Quipsville, everything is possible......

Back To Pavilion

IPL season isn’t it? I’m not much of a cricket fan but T20 I do follow. I’m just hoping the royals buck up soon or I’ll have to hide my head in the sand when I meet a few people after the seasons done;-) but that’s not what this post is all about. Right now I’m back to pavilion.......back home that is;-)
What’s it like coming home after a year???? I’m having a nice time I’d say. Like the last three years, this year was no exception, my flight was delayed by an hour, which is why mum and dad didn’t bother setting out early from home to pick me up. Off from the airport I thought I’d take a much needed nap on the 2 hour drive home to Sohar........
Now I’m sure most of you have never heard of this place. Trust me it’s practically Timbuktu, Google it, I’m not going to bother explaining where it’s located. Suffice to say it’s somewhere between Muscat and Dubai (there’s no way you don't know where’s Dubai). Where was I? Oh yes that nap.....it never happened. Why? Because I’m not used to a car that glides over a very smooth road at 120km/h..... I seem to have grown rather attached to the potholed, winding roads of Mangalore. Sleep on such a smooth road is a farfetched dream.......
So we finally reach home!!!!! Cramped legs, jammed back and all..... And I’m lost...... no kidding, long absence from home + a mum with a lot of free time on her hands = one lost kid whose home on vacation. I headed for my room to change only to open the cupboard and find it wiped clean. No trace of my clothes anywhere!!!!!! Seems mum bundled off all my old clothes to charity. “Well what do I wear? Pat came the reply,” Go hunt in dads cupboard!” so I’m now forced to swim and float around in oversized tees n shorts, all the while thanking my lucky stars that you guys aren’t around to see it ;-)
That wasn’t the end of it......while I was trying to locate the stuff I needed mum casually mentioned that we had to attend two parties that evening. “Which one are you guys going for?” I asked. “Both”, said mum. Parties here don't start till about 9 or 10 in the night so they’d worked out a schedule. 9-11 at one party and the rest of the night at another. My protests of being too tired (which I was!!) went in vain. I was dragged along anyway, bleary eyed, splitting head ache and all.
The a/c’s here are a truly welcome respite from the soaring temperatures back in India, but it takes some getting used-to to the ridiculously low temperatures that people here set it at. How low???Low enough to freeze the bottle of hair oil in my room. My fogged up mind kept imagining myself in the tundras. The Irish cream and wine wasn’t helping coz the blaring cacophony they called singing was, I’m sure, way above the permissible decibel for humans....
Thanks to jet lag and no sleep for over 24 hours, I was bushed when we got home at 5.30 in the morning, IST (jet lag remember??) slept 8 hours straight.
Right now I’m busy making the house habitable according to me and messing up according to mum. The remote’s missing from its usual place, sofa cushions are thrown about, novels all over the place, chocolate wrappers everywhere..... “It’s a mess!!”, shrieks mum. “face it, the kids are home!!”, I retort ;-) the house no longer looks like a museum or ones you see on those picture perfect descriptions on the magazines.....
Now if I could only find a way to speed up the ridiculously low net speed here.....ever tried working on a speed of 40kbps?? Its hell....... I better get those dishes done before mum enters the kitchen.......
Yup I’m well and truly back to pavilion......

Size Zero?????

This year started out pretty great for me. For the first time ever I didn’t have to bother about fitting into a dress. I’ve always been a wee bit on the heavier side since childhood so I’d normally shun those oh-so-cute-n-sexy dresses that are so blatantly displayed in all stores come the new year. But like I said, I didn’t have to bother this year, all thanks to an extremely successful exercise regime I’ve been religiously following the last 7 months. Since it’s worked so well for me, I think it’s only right that I share it with those friends of mine who could some help in that department. Mostly because it’s a highly successful but little known programme.
Now I must warn you that the trainers in this regime are very hard taskmasters. And the first few days leave you aching all over. I normally start it off at 7.30 in the morning. Depending on how late I am, warm up varies from a brisk walk to an all out run and ends with a jump on to a one square foot board. Now starts the tricky part and this took me a long time to master. You’re standing on a board suspended about 4 to 5 feet off the ground and the boards moving in all possible directions. To make matters worse, you’re not the only one going through this torturous routine, there have to be at least 50 odd people crammed in all around you at the same time. So you’ve got to learn to maintain your balance and not fall on the others. This part tends to put everyone in a bad mood. So if you’re not used to hurling abuses at people, you better carry a pair of ear plugs.
Like I mentioned earlier, this is an all out workout routine that exercises all parts at once. Upper body work outs include holding on to railings attached to the ceiling. Thanks to all the swaying around of the floor, you’ve got to use your hands to stay in one place, though I admit there have been several times when I felt like my arm was being ripped out of its socket. Oh, I forgot to mention. This routine also involves a very unpleasant massage. It mostly involves being poked in the back, elbows jabbed into your ribs and stomach, and not to forget, people stepping all over your toes. It’s going to leave you black n blue all over. I come home every day with really colourful bruises but I’m pretty much used to it now.The last 2 minutes involve kicking, pushing and pulling people around so that you can make it to the door on time. Good way to learn how to get out of crowds.
I admit it sounds really painful but trust me it’s worth it. I’ve tried all sorts of diets before and none of them worked. But this is the only regime that allows me to eat everything I want and still lose weight. And the best part, it only lasts for 20 minutes!!!! No more slogging at the gym for hours just to lose a couple of kgs.
For those of you who’re interested in trying this out, these centres are pretty easy to locate.
Just walk down the road and jump into a public transport bus during peak hours. You’ll get the best work out money can buy. I'm still working towards achieving the perfect figure;-)

Stuck in the 18th Centuary

oh well i came to the cyber all set to put up a post, but right now i seem to belong to a place thats about 10 years in the past!!! for heavens sake, i never expected to enter a net cafe which has no usb port. as of right now i'm busy hammering on some sort of ancient keyboard that seems to resemble a typewriter and my fingers are beginning to hurt from punching so hard. i better come up with some ideas soon to convince dad to get me a broadband connection,but considering my miserable performance in the exams, thats not likely to happen. ah well might as well put up the post later, my fingers are beginning to smart, cya ppl.....